If you’re anything like me then sometimes you just need a good laugh or two to get through a stressful or boring day at work.
So to help you out with that I’d like to share 52 hilarious work quotes in today’s post.
Funny ones to help you release some pent up pressure and stress. Somewhat inspirational ones that make you laugh and can help you shift your perspective a bit for the day.
And clever and timeless sayings you can share with your favorite colleagues to make their day a bit better too.
Hilarious Work Quotes to Help You Relieve Stress
“I like work; it fascinates me. I can sit and look at it for hours.”
– Jerome K. Jerome
“Hard work never killed anybody, but why take the chance?”
– Edgar Bergen
“The best way to appreciate your job is to imagine yourself without one.”
– Oscar Wilde
“If you think your boss is stupid, remember: you wouldn’t have a job if he was any smarter.”
– Albert Grant
“The trouble with unemployment is that the minute you wake up in the morning you’re on the job.”
– Slappy White
“People who work sitting down get paid more than people who work standing up.”
– Ogden Nash
“Work is against human nature. The proof is that it makes us tired.”
– Michel Audiard
“I’ve got all the money I’ll ever need, if I die by four o’clock.”
– Henny Youngman
“The worst part of success is trying to find someone who is happy for you.”
– Bette Midler
“I work for myself, which is fun. Except when I call in sick, I know I’m lying.”
– Rita Rudner
“My keyboard must be broken, I keep hitting the escape key, but I’m still at work.”
– Unknown
“I always arrive late at the office, but I make up for it by leaving early.”
– Charles Lamb
“The only thing that ever sat its way to success was a hen.”
– Sarah Brown
“The brain is a wonderful organ; it starts working the moment you get up in the morning and does not stop until you get into the office.”
– Robert Frost
“I’m not afraid of hard work. I’ve done so much of it I know what it looks like.”
– Bob Hope
Hilarious Work Quotes for Your Work Colleagues
“Choose a job you love, and you will never have to work a day in your life… because that field probably isn’t hiring.”
– Dorothy Parker
“Dream big, work hard, stay focused, and surround yourself with funny people.”
– Carol Burnett
“Success is just a matter of luck, ask any failure.”
– Earl Wilson
“No man goes before his time – unless the boss leaves early.”
– Groucho Marx
“Hard work spotlights the character of people: some turn up their sleeves, some turn up their noses, and some don’t turn up at all.”
– Sam Levenson
“The difference between try and triumph is just a little umph!”
– Marvin Phillips
“Work until your bank account looks like a phone number.”
– Richard Branson
“The expert in anything was once a beginner, but the beginner probably had more fun.”
– Unknown
“Success is not the key to happiness. Happiness is the key to success. If you love what you are doing, you will be successful.”
– Mark Twain
“The only place success comes before work is in the dictionary.”
– Vince Lombardi
“I always wanted to be somebody, but now I realize I should have been more specific.”
– Lily Tomlin
“If you think you are too small to make a difference, try sleeping with a mosquito.”
– Dalai Lama
“Success is like reaching an important birthday and finding you’re exactly the same.”
– Audrey Hepburn
“Doing nothing is very hard to do… you never know when you’re finished.”
– Leslie Nielsen
“Don’t worry about people stealing your ideas. If your ideas are any good, you’ll have to ram them down people’s throats.”
– Howard Aiken
Hilarious Quotes on Work Pressure and For When You’re Fed Up
“The reward for good work is more work.”
– Francesca Elisia
“Meetings: None of us is as dumb as all of us.”
– Dave Barry
“I’ve learned that you can tell a lot about a person by the way they handle these three things: a rainy day, lost luggage, and tangled Christmas tree lights.”
– Maya Angelou
“The closest to perfection a person ever comes is when he fills out a job application form.”
– Stanley Randall
“If you try to fail, and succeed, which have you done?”
– George Carlin
“Work is the greatest thing in the world. So we should always save some of it for tomorrow.”
– Don Herold
“Committee: A group of people who individually can do nothing but together can decide that nothing can be done.”
– Fred Allen
“The best way to appreciate your job is to imagine yourself without one.”
– Oscar Wilde
“Most people work just hard enough not to get fired and get paid just enough money not to quit.”
– George Carlin
“It’s a shame that the only thing a man can do for eight hours a day is work. He can’t eat for eight hours; he can’t drink for eight hours; he can’t make love for eight hours. The only thing a man can do for eight hours is work.”
– William Faulkner
“A cubicle is just a padded cell without a door.”
– Mitchell Ratner
“I’ve learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them roll their eyes.”
– Robin Williams
“Never put off until tomorrow what you can avoid altogether.”
– Steven Wright
“I’m not late, I just like to make an entrance.”
– Marilyn Monroe
“The light at the end of the tunnel has been turned off due to budget cuts.”
– Robert Townsend
“If your boss is getting you down, look at him through the prongs of a fork and imagine him in jail.”
– David Brent
“A meeting is an event where minutes are taken and hours are wasted.”
– James T. Kirk
“My resume is just a list of things I hope you never ask me to do.”
– Scott Adams
“I’m not arguing, I’m just explaining why I’m right.”
– Jane Goodall
“By working faithfully eight hours a day you may eventually get to be boss and work twelve hours a day.”
– Robert Frost
“I hate when I lose things at work, like pens, papers, sanity and dreams.”
– Sarah Cooper
“When a man tells you that he got rich through hard work, ask him: ‘Whose?’”
– Don Marquis
Want more funny quotes and motivational sayings for your work day? Have a look at these positive workplace quotes, these quotes for work (motivation to work hard and smart) and this one with helpful work ethic quotes. Plus this post that’s filled with inspiring teamwork quotes.
